News
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Trump Orders Remote Working Federal Employees to be Abducted from Homes and Brought Back to Office
WASHINGTON – As a follow up to President Trump’s recent executive order forcing federal…
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After Trump Executive Order Department of Education Brings Back Segregation
WASHINGTON – President Trump signed an executive order Monday morning demanding the Department of…
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Doomsday Cult Disappointed Yet Again as World Fails to End for Fifth Consecutive Prophecy
DES MOINES, IOWA – Members of the Heaven’s Truth organization, who are adamant their…
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FDA Approves First-Ever Prescription Strength Placebo
WASHINGTON — In a landmark decision this week, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA)…
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Elon Musk Unveils Hitler Statue in White House After Netanyahu Defends Him As “Great Friend of Israel”
Prime Minister of Israel Benjamin Netanyahu made a post on X saying, Musk “is…
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Elon Musk Realizes He Knows Nothing About Government Efficiency Midway Through Speech About Government Efficiency
WASHINGTON, DC – During a press conference at the White House this morning, Elon…
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Mark Zuckerberg Unable to Attend Trump Inauguration Due to Reptilian Meeting Being Held the Same Day
MENLO PARK, CA — Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced that he will be unable to…
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OpenAI Whistleblower Coincidentally Drops Dead in Courtroom, Seconds Before He is Set to Testify
SAN FRANCISCO, CA – OpenAI whistleblower Jai Agarwal tragically died in a courtroom mere moments…
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Mark Zuckerberg Claims He Does Not Have Secret Reptilian Meetings About World Domination in His Underground Bunker
SILICON VALLEY, CA — In a hastily arranged press conference, Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg denied…
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President Biden Wins a $5 Bet on Trump Defeating Harris, Prompting Questions About Political Betting
In a twist no one saw coming (except, apparently, President Joe Biden), the Commander-in-Chief…