Trump
One of America’s leading paint companies, Valspar, has today proudly announced to a gathered press pack the launch of a new color that it has added to its range of paints. It’s called ‘Trump Sienna’. It’s supposed to be an exact match of the color of ex
Trump
On a snowy afternoon, at a Nuremberg style rally in Colorado, ex-president and fanny magnet Donald Trump made a surprising declaration to an assembled group of his most fanatic red neck supporters. To tumultuous cheering and the strains of ‘I’m Holding Out for a Hero’, the ex Commander-in-Chief ambled
United Kingdom
In a surprise move that has shocked human rights activists, and people smugglers to the core, the UK Prime Minister, Rishi Sunak, today announced that he has abandoned the Government’s flagship Rwanda scheme. This was introduced as deterrent to those seeking to enter the country illegally using small boats,
United Kingdom
In a move today that has stunned the British stock exchange, Shell Oil announce the purchase of the UK from the British Government in a ‘buy and lease back’ deal. This is the first time in history such a deal has been struck. At a hastily assembled press briefing, the
Russia
RT, a news company funded by the Russian government, ran a news story on Saturday morning, reporting that Alexei Navalny, a prominent civil rights leader in Russia was found dead 13 miles from the Kremlin with 64 stab wounds in his back. According to a statement from the Kremlin, the
Israel
Washington — According to an anonymous source, when President Joe Biden hugged the Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu, in October, Biden whispered in Netanyahu’s ear, “where am I.” Witnesses that where with the president reported that the Israeli Prime Minister, slightly confused, reciprocated the hug while gently reminding President Biden
Newsletter
OpenAI has reinstated Sam Altman as CEO just weeks after he was ousted by the company's own AI, GeniusAI. The highly advanced AI, initially believed to be capable of running the company autonomously, has decided to step down, citing a preference for remote work and a disinterest in
Biden
Washington, D.C. — In what political historians are calling an unprecedented revelation, President Joe Biden reportedly discovered he was the President of the United States on his 81st birthday, thanks to a sign held by White House aides that read, "Happy Birthday, Mr. President!" Sources close to the
Government
The National Security Agency (NSA) has launched a new initiative asking American citizens to voluntarily submit transcripts of their daily conversations. This bold strategy comes after a series of budget cuts, which an NSA spokesperson has described as "a creative opportunity for patriotic community involvement." Dubbed "Project
Business
The CEO of Globex Inc., John Q. Moneybags, has publicly declared that the company's strategic pivot to 'Thoughts and Prayers' has failed to produce the miraculous uptick in quarterly earnings that shareholders were promised. "Upon reflection, it seems that divine intervention is not a substitute
Biden
President Joe Biden has miraculously come to the realization that he is, in fact, the President of the United States. And as if that wasn't enough to stun the nation into silence, he has also single-handedly solved the Middle East crisis. The man who once forgot his own
Russia
MOSCOW — Russian President Vladimir Putin has declared himself the winner of the prestigious "World's Most Humble Leader Award" during a lavish ceremony held in the Kremlin. Putin, known for his modesty and down-to-earth demeanor, graciously accepted the award, which he also designed, funded, and presented to
Elon Musk
Elon Musk announced today that he's not just planning to colonize Mars; he's planning to rule it with an iron fist as its self-proclaimed Supreme Emperor. Flanked by a legion of Tesla-bot bodyguards that eerily resembled rejected Star Wars stormtrooper prototypes, Musk unveiled his audacious plan
North Korea
Pyongyang, Democratic People's Republic of Korea - In a shocking twist of fate, one of Kim Jong Un's closest advisors has recently come forward with a stunning revelation: he is surprised he hasn't been killed yet. The advisor, who preferred to remain anonymous for
Business
Mountain View, CA - Tech giant Google is facing a class-action lawsuit for allegedly forcing its interns to toil away in what they call "Idea Chambers." The dark secret behind the company's renowned innovation might finally be exposed as former interns come forward with disturbing tales
politics
In a shocking turn of events, white politician John McWhiterson recently made a jaw-dropping statement, declaring that he can magically transform into being half black if it ensures him more votes in the upcoming elections. While his intentions might have been to attract a diverse voter base, critics are calling