Foreign Affairs
Antony Blinken, currently the 71st US Secretary of State and the man that gave the world bland diplomacy, has paid a whistle-stop visit to Thailand. In the press briefing following the visit, a spokesperson for Blinken said, “We’ve tried our best to keep this visit under the radar. How
Vladimir Putin
International observers have raised a number of concerns regarding ballot rigging in Russia's election for president. A spokesperson for the team of over a hundred polling station monitors, Livanya Knees, raised a list of concerns at a news conference in Helsinki after the ballots had closed, and the
Supreme Court
In a rare intervention by the Supreme Court in America, it has handed down a ruling that an ancient law governing presidential elections is to be enacted for the upcoming 2024 presidential election. This states that the two leading candidates must compete in an egg-and-spoon race over one hundred yards.
Donald Trump
At a red neck rally in Idaho yesterday, a packed hall of ‘bubbas’ was stunned into silence by the weird and somewhat deranged antics of their hero, ex president and fanny magnet Donald Trump. Just under ten thousand red neck Trump acolytes had each paid a $200 entrance fee to
United Kingdom
The disgraced former prime minister of the UK, Boris Johnson, has accepted the role of ‘Beppo the sad faced clown’ in a bizarre remake of the international best selling novel by Stephen King, ‘IT’. King’s novel has already been adapted into a two-part miniseries, as well as spawning two
Donald Trump
At one of ex president and fanny magnet Donald Trump’s Nuremberg style rallies in Iowa yesterday, a publicity stunt organized by the alleged sex offender, fraudster and traitor, Trump, seriously backfired. The publicity stunt involved the use of a martial arts training dummy. This had been modified to have
Joe Biden
President Biden has a reputation for blunders, but his latest clusterfuck trumps (no pun intended) them all. His advisors informed the president that the swing state of Georgia was a fundamental place to hold a rally for his supporters if he was to succeed in winning the presidential election later
Houthi Rebels
The world’s media was shocked by the news that emerged yesterday that Farne Island had been invaded by a small band of Houthi rebels. A force of twelve Houthis ‘raided’ the scenic island off the coast of Northumberland in the UK. The attack party landed on the beach at
Steve Bannon
Ex White House Chief Strategist, and shagged out 60s pop star Peter Noone lookalike, Steve Bannon, admitted to a press gathering that he wears Nazi SS uniform onesie pyjamas in bed. The surprise admission came after this question was asked of Bannon by young Gavin, the UK cub reporter for
Entertainment
In a move that has stunned silly cartoon lovers across the globe, the agent for Marge Simpson, Michael Mouse, announced at a press call that she was quitting the TV cartoon series ‘The Simpsons’ forthwith. “Marge was a founder member of the cast from the first episode until today,” said
President Joe Biden is no stranger to gaffes. In a recent press call the incumbent Commander-in-Chief kept mixing up Gaza with Ukraine regarding airdrops of aid. However, his latest gaffe has caused outrage around the world, particularly in the UK. After a campaign of missile attacks on shipping by the
Training Wheels
In a move to squash the never ending press lambasts at President Joe Biden’s fragility, his aides have had him fitted with a set of training wheels. At a hastily assembled press gathering at The White House, Biden’s Director of Communications, Mr William Bullshit, announced the move. “We’
Supreme Court
Ex-president and fanny magnet Donald Trump has had his share of troubles with the US courts of late. But now in a move widely predicted by pundits, the US Supreme Court has agreed to rule on Trump’s most difficult and controversial court battle. Trump is defending an action brought
Joe Biden
In a presidential election year it was predictable that one side or the other’s candidate would come up with an outrageous scheme to improve their chances of becoming the president. It was generally thought that ex president Donald Trump would be the most likely to invent a way of
Donald Trump
Ex president and orange-faced loud mouth Donald Trump boasted at a recent press call that, because he has recently had his mugshot entered onto police files, he now identifies more with criminals, crooks, embezzlers, traitors, sexual perverts, muggers, the mafia, petty thieves, fraudsters, and kiddie fiddlers. “Just look at my
United Kingdom
There was turmoil in the UK House of Commons yesterday after the Speaker, Sir Lindsay Hoyle, carried out a prank on the assembled Members of Parliament, that has been widely condemned by all UK parliamentary parties, the establishment, and the majority of British citizens. “It was in extremely bad taste,