Humor
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Leaked: Trump has Shrine to Vladimir Putin and Xi Jinping in Oval Office
WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to an anonymous White House staffer, President Trump has erected…
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Israel’s Prime Minister Adds ‘Break Ceasefire’ to List of Common Daily Tasks
Jerusalem – According to statements made during a press conference, Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin…
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Putin Denies Involvement in Political Opponent’s Death, Cites “Rare Condition Where People Fall 70 Feet Out of Windows”
MOSCOW — Responding to growing speculation over the mysterious death of opposition figure and…
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Local True Crime Enthusiast Can’t Wait Until Serial Killer Commits Next Murder
SPRINGFIELD, IL — Local resident and self-described “true crime junkie” Melissa Hargrove says she’s…
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White House Has Contingency Plan in Case the Rapture Happens and Trump Gets Left Behind
WASHINGTON — According to an anonymous source in the White House, the Trump Administration…
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Press Conference on Meta’s Smart Glasses Derails as Zuckerberg Faces Tough Questions About Molting Season
MENLO PARK, CA — What began as a highly orchestrated product launch for Meta’s…
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CEO Says Company’s Benefits Package Includes Dental, Vision, and Not Starving to Death
SAN FRANCISCO – Recently announced startup Meridian Technologies, a call center and sales company,…
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Trump Nationalizes D.C. Police to Protect City From Jaywalking Epidemic
WASHINGTON – In an effort to crack down on what Trump described as “the…
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Local Man Bravely Fights Inflation by Not Paying His Friends Back
BOSTON – Local man Kyle Henderson has found a way to personally combat inflation.…
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Parents Tell Four-Year-Old She’s Not Special, Just ‘Adequate Enough to Pay Rent Someday’
SEATTLE – Tired of their four-year-old daughter “bragging” about wanting to be a princess,…