Local Man Bravely Fights Inflation by Not Paying His Friends Back

BOSTON - Local man Kyle Henderson has found a way to personally combat inflation. He simply never reimburses his friends.

"They say the dollar doesn't stretch like it used to," Kyle explained while sipping from a coffee he definitely didn't pay for. "So I'm just keeping mine. You know, to protect it. From inflation."

Sources confirm that Kyle's strategy involves a carefully calculated sequence of borrowing money, forgetting wallets, and conveniently going to the bathroom when the check arrives. He refers to this as his "Personal Stimulus Package," although no one else seems particularly stimulated.

"At first, we thought he was just bad at math," said longtime friend Alicia. "But then we noticed he was always conveniently short on cash, yet somehow had concert tickets, new shoes, and a monthly subscription to a luxury beef jerky service."

Economists have dubbed Kyle’s approach the "Freeload Standard," a daring deviation from traditional monetary policy where economic stability is maintained by draining the resources of those around you.

"It’s kind of like trickle-down economics," Kyle added. "Except nothing trickles down. I just hold onto the money."

While Kyle’s social credit score has hit an all-time low, he insists he’s performing a civic duty. "I'm keeping liquidity in the system. It’s not my fault my friends are unwilling to make sacrifices for the greater me."

As inflation continues to rise, Kyle’s friends have resorted to sending him Venmo requests labeled "For the Love of God, Pay Me Back." But Kyle remains undeterred.

"Look," he said, packing leftovers into a to-go box he brought from home, "everyone says we need to tighten our belts. I'm just tightening other people’s."

At press time, Kyle was seen calculating how many friends he could rotate through before someone finally cut him off. Financial analysts say the number is surprisingly high.