97% of People that Drive a Tesla Think They're Better Than You, Study Finds
In a groundbreaking study that has rocked the parking lots of Whole Foods and the driveways of Silicon Valley, researchers have concluded that a whopping 97% of Tesla drivers believe they're superior to non-Tesla motorists. The findings, published in the prestigious journal Nature, have finally provided empirical evidence to support what many have suspected while being tailgated by a Model S: these drivers are pretty sure they’re better than you.
The study, which surveyed 5,000 Tesla owners across the United States, asked participants a series of questions designed to gauge their self-perception in relation to those driving gasoline-powered vehicles. A staggering 97% of respondents agreed with statements such as "I feel like a more enlightened person while driving my Tesla," and "My car choice reflects my superior intellect and moral standing."
Dr. Emmett Smith, lead researcher and professor of Social Dynamics at the Electric Vehicle Institute, explained the findings. "We've discovered that Tesla ownership is not just about environmental consciousness or appreciation for technology; it's also a critical component of one's social identity and perceived place in the social hierarchy," said Dr. Smith. "It appears that the act of driving a Tesla carries with it a sense of superiority, akin to being part of an exclusive club that looks down upon the gas-guzzling masses."
Interestingly, the study also found that Tesla drivers are 83% more likely to mention their vehicle's make within the first three minutes of meeting someone new, and 92% admit to using the phrase "it's not just a car, it's a Tesla" at least once in their lifetime.
In response to these findings, Tesla groups and forums have been abuzz with discussions. One prominent Tesla owner and forum moderator, who goes by the username "ElonFanboy123," argued, "It's not about thinking we're better; it's about knowing we're contributing to a sustainable future. But yes, driving a Tesla does automatically make you a more insightful and forward-thinking individual."
Critics of the study have pointed out potential biases, suggesting that the sense of superiority might stem not from the vehicle itself, but from the economic status required to afford a Tesla. However, Dr. Smith believes the phenomenon transcends economic factors. "It's more than just being able to afford a Tesla; it's about what driving a Tesla represents. It's a badge of honor, a signal to the world that says, 'I've made it, and I'm saving the planet, one autopilot mile at a time.'"
As the debate rages on, one thing is clear: next time a Tesla cuts you off in traffic, it's not personal. They probably just think they're better than you.