A Murder

Small-Town Police Chief Happy That Someone In Town was Finally Murdered, Even if it was His Wife

COLLIERVILLE, TX - Collierville, known primarily for its annual corn festival and competitive knitting circles, has now skyrocketed into infamy with its first recorded murder since, presumably, the dawn of time. The murder, described as "at least second-degree" and "definitely not an accident," occurred sometime between

Russia

Small Percentage of Voters that did not Vote for Putin Found Dead, Putin Claims He Only Killed All of Them

MOSCOW - In an over the top display of political oppression, President of Russia, Vladimir Putin has had every single voter who did not vote for him in the recent election killed. "Winning an election by less than 100% is unacceptable," exclaimed Putin at a press briefing. Political